brandnewswastikas:

I like it when a girl has a food stain on her shirt because it means that she’s bad with spoons and will probably need me to feed her and I’m good with spoons so it will give me a chance to show off a little. 

coochiejuice:

Sometimes you just gotta spank your own ass and be like “oooh”

hotlocalsingle:

DONT SIT ON TOP THIS DICK IF U SCARED OF HEIGHTS